The Red Thing

I picked it up, drew it upon my lips.. 

The red thing looked different, was this me? Who was that? My friend DW squealed with excitement, she said it was 'beautiful'. Well, i looked at my reflection, i didn't see that. I didn't see beauty. How can she use beauty and me in the same statement? How? Scoffs, She doesn't see.. The dirt that is me, the nothingness of this.

I was to walk around with the red thing on my lips. She begged, insisted and threatened. I couldn't wipe it off.

I couldn't, that was a condition.. Well see, the red thing didn't validate me. It didn't. I was still ugly.. 

But she made me take a picture and insisted i posted it. The comments, the likes. The Shock. I couldn't get it. What do they see? What are they talking about? Well, they are trying to make me feel good i said, I shrugged it off.

Then i got home. Went to my neighbors, who are now friends. One kept staring at me, i blushed, like a little girl - i didn't meet his gave.. He said, you are beautiful.. Oh My God.. For over 30 mins  he kept looking at me.. Not through me, at me. I shook my head.. This was real, i am not invisible. 

I sent this picture to a friend i have never met. She went 'ape shit' - I imagined her jumping, it made me laugh. She said words, she told me. 'Whooooosh' she went, i could feel her excitement. I blushed some more. 

I stayed for a little over 3 hrs, he gushed. The other, looked at me.. Stunned, he kept shaking his head. I didn't get.. I looked in the mirror, i couldn't see it..

I slept off, then woke up and went to my room.. Laid down to drift away again and with Sinach's voice belting out I expected to be in La La land, but the words I am blessed, kings shall come to my rising struck my heart. 

Kings? What.. Me?

Then the tears, they flowed.. I stood in front of the mirror and looked.. I saw it, not fully but I saw her.. Not that damaged girl, but this woman. The one who loves God, the one who understands that her body is the temple of the Most High. The one who God has loved through it all.. 

So i spoke to my Father, i begged for forgiveness, for hating this Temple of his and treating it like garbage.. Everybody sees a kings kid.. I know i am a Kings kid, i just didn't see it..

It may take awhile for me to get used to it, the beauty that is me.. I used beauty and me in the same statement but i shall look at the mirror everyday, every minute. I shall look at my reflection and call it beautiful.

I am blessed.. 

The miracle of the red thing.. A lipstick it was - Guerlain it is called..